Hey, it’s been a while, eh? Hope I didn’t miss anything important going on with you. Had a birthday? I’m sure it was happy. Birthed a baby? I’m sure it was cuddly. Bought a house? What, with these interest rates? Dealing with health issues? Now we have something in common…
I’ve been laid low for the last two months due to severe back pain. It has been subsiding slowly since getting on a proper course of treatment, but those first three weeks were intolerable. TL;DR: suffered a sudden and crippling back spasm exiting a car in mid-June; ended up in the ER that night and again at the end of the week; an MRI during that second visit showed spinal stenosis (narrowing of the spinal column, putting pressure on the cord and nerves). Rest, medication, physical therapy, and more medication (fentanyl, morphine, toradol, oxycodone all administered; gabapentin most impactful) are all part of the rotation, but I’m still far from 100%. However, I (and, more importantly, my orthopedist) believe I should get largely back to normal without surgery.
Now, that’s my excuse for most of this summer — but what about before that? I’d love to say I’ve been overwhelmed with book signings and readings and prestigious awards and dealing with an onslaught of media in support of my latest book (which, you may vaguely recall, came out in November 2022 and is entitled The Best I Can Do). That, however, would be an exaggeration of what I actually was able to do in support of that book:
I reached out via a mass e-mail to literally every library in the state of Maine, offering to visit and read from the book. I was advised how to do this by an actual librarian. Responses received: none.
After a signing at a local bookstore in December, another independent bookseller in Norway (Maine, not Europe) graciously offered to host me for a signing AND reading. This was on a Saturday in mid-March — a gorgeous day, perfect for area residents and passers-by to investigate all the lovely shops in this charming locale’s inviting downtown. I sold *one* book, and there were never more than 3 customers in the shop at a time, making a reading seem less an entertaining interlude and more an invasion of their right to browse undisturbed.
I was graced with a lovely review in our local newspaper, and received an award in an international indie-book contest. The award led to a front-page article in the paper (below the fold, but still).
Now, I am back to toileting toiling under anonymity. Time to get back to writing on a more regular schedule. Also newslettering.
SPECIAL OFFER: I’ve got a few copies of the book sitting around, not making themselves useful in any way — if you’d like one, please email or text me and I’ll send you one, for free! I’ll even autograph it! And attempt to spell your name correctly!
All I ask in return — ask, not demand — is, if you enjoy the book at all, please post a review on Amazon or Goodreads or whatever social media you engage with. Reviews for us indie writers are like oxygen: self-published books die without the attention.
What with that demanding book publicity schedule combined with the various narcotics and opioids I’ve been prescribed, I haven’t written all that much this year — but here’s what’s new since the last time I sent out a newsletter. Take your time, don’t rush…
Political Punditry
(I might as well get these out of the way):
Until the Day I Deny (May 9, 2023)
Remember wa-a-ay back in May, when Trump was found liable in a civil suit for sexual abuse and defamation, and ordered to pay $5 million in damages to the victim? Seems like a distant memory now, doesn’t it?
French Kitsch (May 31, 2023)
As former Trump acolytes began to turn their backs on him, he tried to reverse time and claim he’d abandoned them first.
Don’t Take Debate (August 21, 2023)
The only debate I’d like to see Trump participate in would be one between his id and ego. He’d lose, both ways.
Lighter Verse
Road Sigh (January 12, 2023)
Posted the day after my sixty-sixth birthday, so you can see what frame of mind it left me in.
Toes Be or Not Toes Be (April 2, 2023)
This alleged “news” caught my attention, prompting this rhyme about the absurdity of the claim made herein. I think I really (toe)nailed it.
Other Rando Stuff
Not with a Bang but a Whisker (February 14, 2023)
I wrote about how we became a cat-less household after 40 years of being owned by a host of furballs.
But that fallow period didn’t last too long… This li’l sweetie came our way just a few weeks later:
Oblivious to the Obvious (February 23, 2023)
Do you recognize the musician in this photo? If so — kudos to you! Otherwise… if only there were a convenient and ubiquitous device permitting you to momentarily clear your throat or retreat to the kitchen for a glass of water and then come back all knowledgeable-like.
Gym Dandy (April 4, 2023)
In this post, I side-step any admission regarding how often I actually exercise at the gym. This was written before my back issues surfaced, and since then I haven’t been able to even think about pretending to go to the gym as often as I used to pretend to.
Pees and Queues (April 19, 2023)
I really was uncomfortably prescient with that earlier Road Sigh post, wherein I joked about the infirmities associated with getting older, when considering what I’ve actually experienced this year. Less than a month before the whole back kerfuffle, I had an appointment with a urologist about some increasingly discomforting issues involving my ability (or lack thereof) to “make water,” he said euphemistically. When I went to the ER the first time for my back pain, a CT scan highlighted all sorts of urological issues, all of which the doctor attempted to address in one way or another during my visit and none of which, as it turned out, had anything to do with the source of or relief from my back pain. Ah, how I long for a return to those simpler times when I thought it was a big fucking inconvenience to have to get up multiple times a night to pee…
Flush, With Anticipation (June 2, 2023)
The previous post was written as I awaited my appointment with the urologist; here’s a summary from that first visit. Since then, my pee problems have settled down significantly, due — I presume — to the medications. That’s a welcome development which has left me free to focus exclusively on my back issues. Such a blessing…
Tax Onna Me (August 13, 2023)
By now, I’m sure you’ve had more than enough of my usurpations about my urinary concerns. For a change of pace, here’s a story about a time-consuming encounter with the IRS with an ending that all but took the piss out of me.
I’ve kept you long enough. Hope this genuinely finds you doing well — odds are you gotta be doing better than I am at the moment, although I will admit to slow but steady progress.
Don’t forget to request that book copy if you’re so inclined!