Happy Halloween! (Or, as you may choose to type it, “Hap’py Hallowe’en!”) It’s been many years since I donned a costume for the occasion, but I have never stopped bothering strangers for candy.
Rhyme for the News had a productive month, even with a break for a week or so due to a mini-vacation. The common theme to this month’s postings — man, I really needed a vacation:
Temper Fidelis (October 1, 2021)
No doubt you’ve heard, and perhaps even witnessed, customers being rude to the clerks and waitstaff who are scrambling to serve the public in the midst of shortages (both people and supplies) — all amidst the ongoing stress of living through the Covid pandemic. Several old adages in the customer service industry are now being replaced with “BE KIND OR LEAVE”:
Restaurants and others in the hospitality business have long espoused “the customer is always right” and “all are welcome.” Now, many are rethinking that philosophy thanks to a surge in toxic customers and poor behavior.
In the case of (restaurant owner Chris) Sirianni’s restaurant, he chose kindness with an ultimatum, a directive gaining favor elsewhere. Others are choosing a more conciliatory approach, acknowledging inadequate staffing levels and asking for patience, but unapologetic about masking requirements and other public-health measures.
Nearly all hotels, restaurants and other customer-facing businesses are talking with each other to ask what works, what doesn’t and attempting to find some way to improve the situation.
“We’ve always been people-pleasers in the hospitality industry,” says Farouk Rajab, general manager of the Providence Marriott Downtown Hotel in Rhode Island. “The customer was always right. Well, they’re not.”
[Read more here: https://on.wsj.com/2Zy2zCp]
I spent the majority of my pre-light verse career in various customer-facing training and management positions and can recount endless anecdotes regarding abhorrent consumer behaviors (and, regrettably, some severe lapses in employee professionalism). On the few occasions we’ve gone out to eat in the past year and a half, my wife and I have dealt with abbreviated menus and near-glacial service — but I have *never* taken any frustration out on the clearly overwhelmed staff. Instead, I direct it at my wife for having suggested we dine out in the first place.
And let’s not get started with all the assaults taking place on planes… I may never be brave enough to fly again.
Running Short (October 2, 2021)
Speaking of old adages, there appears to be an update required to “slow and steady wins the race” — we need to add “… as long as you follow the marked route”:
An Illinois man unexpectedly won the Quad Cities Marathon this weekend when the two Kenyan runners who had far outpaced him were disqualified after being diverted off the course by a race volunteer bicyclist.
Tyler Pence crossed the finish line in 2 hours, 15 minutes, 6 seconds to become the first U.S. runner since 2001 to win the race through the Quad Cities along the Mississippi River in Illinois and Iowa. Pence, the head track and cross-country coach at the University of Illinois-Springfield, logged his fastest time ever with the win and took the first prize of $3,000.
Pence’s win came after Elijah Mwangangi Saolo and Luke Kibet diverted from the course a little more than halfway to the finish line when the bicycle rider leading them mistakenly went straight when he should have turned, the Quad-City Times reported.
[Read more here: https://bit.ly/3pUqo25]
A marathon is a bit over 26 miles. I haven’t run 26 miles, collectively, in my entire life. I’ve never had the urge to become a runner… although, I *have* had the runs. Upon reflection, I did move pretty quickly when those came on.
J’Acuzzi…! (October 9, 2021)
During our mini-vacation, Carol and I spent some time percolating in a friend’s hot tub. It was delightful and relaxing. Also, there were only the three of us in the stew. I can’t imagine paying to be paraded through downtown while soaking with a dozen other people:
One of Nashville's most recognizable party vehicles is in hot water as the city attempts to shut it down for allegedly operating without a public swimming pool permit.
Nashville's Metro government asked a judge to temporarily shut down Music City Party Tub — a mobile hot tub business that debuted in the Lower Broadway entertainment district in 2019 — in a lawsuit filed in Davidson County Chancery Court last week.
The entertainment vehicle composed of a trailer fitted with a hot tub is operating illegally without a public swimming pool permit from Metro's health department, according to the lawsuit. The health department issued a letter informing Music City Party Tub of its alleged health code violation on Aug. 11.
[Read more here: https://bit.ly/3bpSyJH]
Nashville is also known as the “Athens of the South” — so perhaps that’s why the idea of communal partying in a rancid vat of lukewarm water while being towed through town on a flatbed trailer is Greek to me.
What in the Whirl (October 13, 2021)
Throughout our recent home renovation project my head was spinning — but, thankfully, not the entire house:
It’s not exactly on par with India’s Taj Mahal, but a family house in a small town in northern Bosnia is in its own way a monument to love.
The house in Srbac was designed and built by 72-year-old Vojin Kusic. With a green facade and red metal roof, it can rotate a full circle to satisfy his wife Ljubica’s shifting desires as to what she would like to see when she looks out of its windows.
“After I reached an advanced age and after my children took over the family business, I finally had enough time to task myself with granting my wife her wish” to be able to change the position of rooms in her house whenever she wants, Kusic said.
[Read more here: https://bit.ly/3CGVBZO]
One of my unimplemented million-dollar ideas is for a restaurant chain where the patrons are seated along the circumference of a round table that rotates, facilitating easy sharing from one another’s entrees. I call this concept “Lazy Susan’s®.” Regrettably, I don’t think it would fly now, what with the pandemic. (Yeah, like *that’s* the only reason it would have gone belly-up…)
Let Us Prey (October 26, 2021)
We were on Cape Cod for part of that mini-vacation, and I was surprised to see the “Be Shark Smart” warning signs whenever we approached the water:
As (reporter C.J.) Chivers notes (in The New York Times Magazine) , the rise in the number of sharks can be attributed to a Nixon-era piece of legislation: the Marine Mammal Protection Act. This law protected marine mammals in the waters around the United States. And while that doesn’t apply to the decidedly non-mammalian sharks, it did benefit seals. And where seals go, so go the sharks that look upon them as tasty, swimming meals.
Finding the appropriate response to the uptick in sharks in and around Cape Cod isn’t an easy task. As the Times article points out, existing laws make it impossible to try to cull seals — which means that trying to improve awareness of, and response times to, the region’s sharks makes the most sense. And being a little more aware of what to expect when you dip your toes into the water is never a bad thing.[Read more here: https://bit.ly/3vZkL3n]
I didn’t link to the source New York Times article because, well… details of the shark attack that opens the piece are quite graphic and disturbing. While inspired by the influx of sharks at the Cape, I meant no disrespect to those who have been attacked by them. It just comes down to that age-old dilemma: what happens when we humans impose our recreational desires upon habitats and their native occupants that existed long before we ambled into them.
Fruit Shilling (October 27, 2021)
If you’ve ever eaten a Pop-Tart (and who among us hasn’t?) or received an unsolicited email promising untold riches from joining a specious class-action lawsuit (and who among us hasn’t?), none of this will surprise you in the least:
No one would mistake Kellogg's Pop-Tarts for a bowl of fruit — they are an indulgent treat, loaded with sugar and processed ingredients. But a new lawsuit claims Pop-Tarts are masquerading as a health food.
A class action lawsuit, filed by Illinois resident Anita Harris in August, alleges the brand's marketing is "misleading because they give people the impression the fruit filling contains a greater relative and absolute amount of strawberries than it does." The lawsuit also focuses on the health benefits that come from strawberries, citing a WebMD description stating that strawberries "protect your heart, increase HDL (good) cholesterol, lower your blood pressure and guard against cancer."
The lawsuit seeks at least $5 million. Harris also alleges the product's name, "Frosted Strawberry Toaster Pastries," is "false, misleading, and deceptive" because the Pop-Tart filling contains a "relatively significant amount of non-strawberry fruit ingredients" including pears and apples. The plantiff said she wanted more than a "strawberry taste," which she nevertheless "failed to receive, due to the relatively greater amount of pears and apples," according to the lawsuit.
The lawsuit indicates that Kellogg's "only promotes the product's strawberry content in its labeling and marketing, such as on its website."
[Read more here: https://cnn.it/3w1IFLz]
Pop-Tarts are, in a word, awful. In two words: really awful.
Pillsbury Cinnamon Rolls, however, are the bomb. And cinnamon is good for you, innit?
Trail Mix-up (October 28, 2021)
Every year there are numerous stories about weekend hikers failing to take common-sense precautions when heading out on trails that they clearly aren’t prepared to properly tackle:
You can get a cellphone signal on the highest mountain in Colorado, and if you get lost hiking that mountain, you should probably answer your phone — even if you don't recognize the caller's number.
That's the message being spread by Lake County Search and Rescue, which tried to help a lost hiker on Mount Elbert by sending out search teams and repeatedly calling the hiker's phone. All to no avail. The hiker spent the night on the side of the mountain before finally reaching safety.
"One notable take-away is that the subject ignored repeated phone calls from us because they didn't recognize the number," the rescue unit said on its Facebook page…
Lake County Search and Rescue is using the incident as a teaching moment.
"If you're overdue according to your itinerary, and you start getting repeated calls from an unknown number, please answer the phone; it may be a SAR [search and rescue] team trying to confirm you're safe!"
[Read more here: https://n.pr/3jR9ddA]
Years ago, Carol and I lived in upstate South Carolina and went for a leisurely Easter Sunday hike in Caesars Head State Park. We’d been there many times before, and enjoyed the moderate but not-too-challenging trek to the overlook where we could see beautiful Raven Cliff Falls. Normally, we’d turn around and go back on the same trail — but I thought, as a special Easter treat, we’d continue further along the trail and complete the entire loop.
I checked online and found a posting where one avid hiker said he’d actually found that continuing on the trail, rather than doubling back, made for an easier hike. Armed with that poorly-sourced information, we set off in a new direction after spending time at the falls overlook. Perhaps I should have paid more attention to the name given the path we were following: the “Dismal Trail.”
We ended up descending down steep, rocky paths using metal ladders embedded in the topography and had to ford across a raging stream using guy-wires. On the other side of the stream, we began the ascent, which I later learned rose 1,100 feet over the final quarter-mile.
We’d long since run out of water and snacks as we began the climb. (Did I mention the temperature on that lovely Easter afternoon reached an unseasonable 80 degrees?) Despite our slow, deliberate pace, Carol developed severe cramps in both legs and finally was unable to continue. I decided to make a dash up the remainder of the trail, see if I could find someone to assist us, and attempt to get Carol back to the car so we could drive into town for a gallon of Gatorade.
As it turned out, by that point we were only a few hundred yards from meeting up with the tail end of our original trail, which from that point was a fairly easy stroll back to the parking lot. I returned to let Carol know all was not lost; fortunately, another couple had stopped to help and shared a banana with her, which helped to alleviate some of the cramping. We made it back to the car, sped to the nearest country store for electrolytes, and then drove home so Carol could take the longest, hottest shower of her life and then slip into bed for a well-deserved, rejuvenating nap.
The moral of this story is: I’m an idiot.
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Hard to believe November is now upon us. Hope you are enjoying all the Hallowe’en go’odies you stole from your kids. We don’t get any trick-or-treaters at our house these days — but that doesn’t mean we don’t have several bags of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups stashed in the pantry closet, “just in case”...
Catch you on the flippity-flop,
JB