When I sent out the last newsletter, I vowed to resume a more regular schedule for future editions. 2.5 months later…
Let me start with the excuses:
It was unseasonably hot here in Maine as summer (which usually only spans a period of two weeks around these parts) wound down. Nobody could get anything done during those sweltering days, certainly not li’l ol’ me.
The House of Representatives was without a Speaker for three weeks (again, longer than summer in these parts). Nobody could get anything done during those 21 days, certainly not li’l ol’ me.
My cystoscopy, originally scheduled for the end of August, was canceled on the morning of the day of, due to the urologist being ill, and there wasn’t another opening (urological pun) on the schedule until, of all dates… Halloween. That was two months of extended dread, only slightly alleviated by the bags of fun-sized candy bars I consumed throughout October. TL; DR: I just had the procedure and everything looked… well, it looked kinda disgusting to me, but the doctor gave me the all-clear. (I would have said the “thumbs-up” — but that’s a proctology joke.)
I have more dodges to offer but will cease with them post haste.
I actually *have* been busy writing — just not many blog posts. Instead, I’ve been working diligently (if “diligently” is a synonym for “occasionally”) on my new book. I believe I’ve shared the proposed title and cover concept before, but here they are again:
Sheep Came in Through the Bathroom Window
It’s going to be a collection of all-original pieces, each with a punning title inspired by a Beatles tune — such as, “I Wanna Hold Your Handbag,” “Set Back,” and “Maxwell’s Silver Grammar.” More to come.
Here are the few online posts I’ve come up with (or should that be, “with which I’ve come up,” or “which I’ve up-chucked”?) since the last newsletter, mostly of the political variety:
Jail Fellow Well Met (August 25, 2023)
Who could forget (as much as they might want to) that a former President of the United States had his mug shot taken — and then turned it into a fund-raising opportunity?
All Tuckered Out (August 30, 2023)
Who could forget (and most of us probably have) that, instead of participating in the first GOP debate, the party’s leading candidate skipped appearing on that stage next to any of the losers competitors for the nomination, and instead sat down with disgraced and increasingly insignificant former Fox “News” host Tucker Carlson for a one-on-one (or, in this case, half-wit-on-half-wit)?
Rankling Member (October 18, 2023)
Who could forget (or even believe, for a few brief days, it was a thing) that shirt-sleeved GOP loudmouth Jim Jordan attempted to become Speaker of the House during that lull in leadership? This was written after his second failed attempt, which he then followed with a third even-worse failure. This cleared the path for MAGA Mike Johnson to step in it… er, step into the role with unanimous support from his side of the aisle. Certainly disaster — or, at least, more verse from me — is to follow.
Idiom-antics (September 15, 2023)
Even I need to take a break from politics once in a while, so I returned to my other favorite topic: that great mystery known as the English language.
And there you have it. I’ll do my best to concoct a holiday edition of this scintillating read. And if I don’t, well… let that be my gift to you.