The Not-So Handy Man Edition
Spring Has Just Sprung, 2025
It’s the last day of March and the driveway needed to be plowed just once this month, so it *seems* Spring has arrived here in Maine. Or, as the locals call it, “mud season.”
If we get any April snow showers, I won’t be shoveling or plowing any of it, due to last month’s hand surgery.
Coming home from the operation:
One week later:
End of that week as the incisions were checked by the P.A.:
And its current state:
I’ve actually been able to type since just a few days post-op; the problem is with the splint banging into the keyboard and launching programs willy-nilly.
Despite that challenge, I generated a shit-ton of Trump & Co. content once the nerve block wore off. Links are listed below in chronological order (but who can make order out of disorder?):
Grateful’s Dead — Vance and Trump stage a rebellion
Lingua, Frankly — making English our official language to mangle
Swoon Fed — Trump flatters Putin after dissing Zelenskyy
Shell Game — the Sec. of Agriculture eggs us on
I Think I’m George-geous — Trump explains his bridge to George Washington
The Cheesy Stands Alone — railing against the gender identity of mice
Gov’s Labors Lost — Trump decides it’s better to stab someone with a scalpel rather than a hatchet
The Prix Fixe Is In — a restaurant serving up access (for a steep price)
Overdriven — Trump opens a Tesla dealership
Tuber Driver — RFK, Jr. gets his fries on
Taking Stocks — the markets go ka-blooey
Blind to Justice — Trump addresses injustices against him during a visit to the DOJ
Defining Characteristics — Promises Made Sarcastically
Impeachy-Keen — the Chief Justice shows something resembling a spine before going back into hiding
With Disregards To — despite what the Chief Justice said…
Stay Chassis — a threat of deportation for torching one of Elon’s death traps
A Pen-sive Moment — “Who” signed this? “What”’s it all about? “I-Don’t-Know” anything about it.
A Pigment of His Imagination — a portrait of a bad portrait
Tales From the Encrypted — SignalGate!
Abridged Too Far — a university student is snatched from the streets for expressing an opinion
Creature Discomfort — The National Zoo is, apparently, also a hotbed of “woke.”
Question Asked and (not really) Answered — Trump defines what a woman is.
As this edition goes out, we’re just two days away from “Liberation Day” — which, apparently, has to do with reciprocal tariffs and not, as I had hoped, Trump’s resignation.
And not even touched upon in the above versifying are the most recent Trumpkerfuffles: doesn’t care about the price of cars going up, suggests there’s a “plan” for him to serve a third term, says he’s now “pissed off” at his buddy Vlad P., Musk hands out millions of dollars to influence an election in Wisconsin…
I think my surgically-repaired hand will continue to get quite a workout in the days ahead.
Thanks, as always, for reading. A reminder: my prize-winning humor collection (with a few Trump poems thrown in there, for balance) “The Best I Can Do” is still on the Less-Sellers’ list! You can order the paperback from Bookshop.org (link provided); also in paper or Kindle from Amazon (which, while I’m grateful for the sales, I won’t link to because Bezos… but it’s easy enough to search for).
Websites: JohnBranning.com / TrumpInVerse.com
Threads / Bluesky / Facebook / Linktree
Best to all,
JB