My holiday gift to all of you is that this will be the last edition of my newsletter for the current year. After perusing the scintillating content contained herein, you will be free to turn your attention back to whatever preoccupies you as 2023 gets ready to call it a wrap.
As far as the Branning family goes — this year we did not pull the menorah out of storage, nor the artificial Christmas tree. The house is decorated but in a more cat-friendly motif since we do not trust our two newest acquisitions to behave in a responsible manner around open flame or dangling ornaments.
2023 was a year of cat transition for us. The last of the five cats who were part of our move to Maine nine years ago passed away in February — that was Nate, joining Miles, Chlöe, Sophie, and Sammy wherever cats end up (certainly a Good Place). In the immediate aftermath of our mourning, I strongly suggested we take some time to experience a feline-free existence, in order to have the option to travel without having to worry about having someone take care of the pets, at least until the end of the upcoming summer; my wife and son took those words to heart and Lucy didn’t join the family until March. We added Penny to the mix in October.
Other than that, it was an entirely uneventful year — other than my two trips to the ER, Carol’s one trip to the ER, and Josh losing his job. I am mostly recovered, Carol is entirely recovered, and Josh continues to search amidst a challenging (but improving, they keep telling us) economy.
Still — roof over our heads, food in the fridge, thankful for what we have when others don’t, yada yada. All in all, 2023 was still a pretty decent year — BUT — we are hoping for a bit smoother ride through 2024.
So much for this part of the narrative; let’s get on to the humorous portion of the Substack.
I wrote a few short pieces in the last month, but they were intended for publication in avenues other than my blog or for contests I entered. All had to be not-previously-displayed-anywhere, so they won’t show up until I receive the various rejections and here’s-the-winner-it’s-not-you notices.
But there was a fair bit of political chicanery going on, so I did post a few rhyming takes on it all:
George of the Bungle (Dec. 2, 2023)
Hard to believe Georgie was on the national scene for less than a year, innit? Well, I’m referring only to his 11-month stunt stint in Congress. He won’t fade from view until… never, unfortunately.
What a Difference a Day Makes (Dec. 11, 2023)
Trump responded to a softball question from Sean Hannity by answering he wouldn’t be a dictator “except for Day One.” Despite the ensuing kerfuffle, or perhaps because of it, he continues to make the claim and his supporters appear to love him all the more for his embrace of authoritarianism. Ha-ha…?
Appetite For Destruction (Dec. 12, 2023)
This one is a mash-up of two Trumpy events: his (or, more likely, his lawyers’) decision not to retake the stand in his New York civil trial for fraud — along with news of Kevin McCarthy’s claim (remember Kevin McCarthy? He was briefly Speaker of the House and his most notable achievement was to utterly annihilate that chamber of Congress) his post-January 6th visit to Mar-A-Lago was to cheer up a despondent former POTUS who was “not eating.” Trump responded to that (literal) gut punch by responding he had been, in fact, OVER-eating, apparently forsaking his otherwise well-balanced diet. Well, y’know — you gotta bulk up if you’re planning to be a dictator, even if only for one day.
I received feedback from a contest I’d entered earlier in the year and (SPOILER ALERT) didn’t win. However, the contest sponsor did make the judges’ reviews available, which I appreciated. The review was actually mostly positive, lauding the book’s structure as “exemplary” and “compelling.” And then there was this comment: “I suggest considering removing the Trump poems to a different book.” Well, I’ve already done that — three times! One of my advance readers made a similar comment, saying their inclusion in the book was “just too much Trump.” What can I say? The political verse is part of my artistic (ha!) output, and even occasionally clever, and they shall continue to come along for the ride until either Trump or I run out of steam.
I’ve also been busy applying for a writing residency, which — speaking of appetites — I became aware of through a passing mention in this article about a James Beard award-winning restaurant that supplies meals for the attendees. Spurred by that tidbit (if you open the article, scroll down to the “Long Days” section and read the fifth paragraph), I learned more about the residency and worked to pull together everything required for the application. I have no sense of whether my attempt will be successful, or if the program administrators will (ironically, for a humor writer) laugh at my entry.
I’ll know by the end of February whether I’ve been accepted and will duly pass along that decision so you can either rejoice along with or console me.
I truly wish you a joyous end to the year and trust 2024 will be rewarding for you and yours. Thanks so much for your support of my attempts at humor. Hoping you’ll continue to be in my camp for some time to come, Trump poems be damned (as he should be, also).
JB